Thursday, February 24, 2011
His little arms are full of bruises from so many IV attempts and he had to spend the entire time we were there with his sucking thum tapped down to the IV board. We spent two nights and a 3 month birthday under the watchful care of Nurse Arla, Nurse Andie, Nurse Joan and Nurse Michelle. They suctioned and counted breathes and suctioned and suctioned and suctioned and suctioned. They readied the oxygen and suctioned. We measured diapers to see how much he was (n't) eating and suctioned and suctioned to help him breath.
He slept through the night last night withought any suctioning, and this morning, the mucus went down enough that the doc thought we could handle it on our own again. Jeremiah picked up Brayden and took him through the ER for anitbiotics to treat the things that are wrong with him and we are back home again. A little bit nervous to be on our own, but home again anyway.
Saturday, February 19, 2011
But because he has RSV, my little coughing punkin' pie has to have his hat on.
He's still happy happy though.
In other news, Brayden loves to take a shower.
He loves it so much, he even undresses most of his little self.
He just struggles a little with his pants and diaper.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
I never wanted to leave home, to grow up or for anything to change. I grew up in a place where my Grandpa built blocks worth of houses with his brothers and remembered our town as it grew up. I grew up in a place where my mom spent her growing years less than a mile from my dad. Her teachers were my teachers and my dads siblings came home to teach in some of the same schools. My parents grew up with my friends parents and we could find common genes in a far reaching bit of my classmates; my little sister and brother shared many of the same friends and my older sisters friends showed me kindness that my shyness made difficult to recognize.
Then something happened and I grew wings that couldn't wait to beat, couldn't wait to work, couldn't wait to fly. My roots were firmly established in our little town, but I needed to break away from the place that only knew me as quiet and held me boxed in; the place that I never wanted to change. If I wanted to change, I had to part from it. I went to college, to Europe and traveled across the country; lived in the north and the west and married a man from the south.
Occasionally that old shy-ness still comes up, prickling my feet with doubts, dusting my memory with a want for nothing to change, for that same security that I wanted never to leave. Looking back I can't say that I ever missed an opportunity that was important to me, but I laugh at the struggles a shy person wrestles with; the perceptions and impressions, the jumbles and the bumbles.
To provide roots for our family we have come closer to home than I have settled in a long time; close to the box that I wanted never to change. When my oldest son asks if we can stay home today, I fight all of the little shy homebody in me for him. I fight all of the urge to wrap myself up in my little families laugh, in my concern for the colds that make noses run and coughs unbearable. I fight the urge to steal the cover of the fog and not let anyone know we are staying under the covers today where nothing has to change and no one has to be social so that school is easier one day. I put Jack's little hat on while he smiles at me and tuck him into his car seat and hand him over to his dad, fighting the quite days that I still have sometimes when I leave the house; the days where I don't say more than three words all day. And I reward myself and my oldest with staying home tomorrow.
And we can snuggle on the couch while Sesame is on, read books in silly voices, smell little baby smells, dance silly dances and be as outrages as we want while we put down roots for our little boys; for our little boys who will some day grow wings.
Monday, February 14, 2011
I tackled my first day back at work.
I did it even though Brayden kept asking if he could stay home or go to work with me.
I did it even though Jack laughed and smiled at me all morning.
I did it.
Just don't tell anyone we have to do it again on Wednesday.
And I may have a margarita before I go to bed on Tuesday night.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
He wiggles and smiles and talks. He tells stories that are so funny he laughs at them and spills a little bit of drool. He coos and goos and ahs and has combinations of the three.
He makes us laugh too. Especially when he gets so carried away that he almost flings himself out of his bouncy chair!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
I believe in Grace, Miracles and Love overflowing. I believe that you have to be more than nice-that God's only Son is the only way as well as the Truth and the Light. I believe it is really, really hard to find Him and we all go our own way to do that; that its supposed to be hard and as long as we never stop searching for a way to be closer we are on the right track.
I believe that we have to be aware and in awe of our one body. That we have the right to provide whole, unadulterated, affordable food and a safe existence for that body including lots of fresh air and unlimited movement.
I believe that healthy minds and bodies are not merely a product of genetics but habits taught and learned from the very beginning of life; that nutrition, physical education and sex education are lessons best learned from the people who love you the most, not strangers, acquaintances or teenaged friends in school rooms.
Most of all, I believe that love is an action word. That as humans we choose it that action and it isn't easy all of the time, some of the time or even ever.
And that Love never fails.
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